It’s the most intimate question one can be asked,and yet few people ask this question of themselves. Who are you? Tough to answer, especially when we live in a society focused on constant action where we’ve become human doings, instead of human beings. We don’t know who we are, and we don’t know how to be. But how can we know what to do, what we want to do, and what we can do and SHOULD do, if we don’t know who we are.
Our being should inform our doing, and yet the reality is that external and societal pressures end up dictating the direction in which we choose to conduct our lives, and that is reflected in our professional environment.
We seek jobs based on factors we deem important such as location, salary, flexibility, and while some factors make sense to consider, we sometimes ignore what should be the most important driver in our decision making: our soul. Is the job in alignment with who I am, does it put my skills to the service of my fellow humans, does it bring me joy and make my heart sing, will it help me grow as a person, is the company ethics and moral in alignment with my own values?
I realize I sound like I live in a utopian reality when writing these words, and that few people can be afforded to think in such a way, but I truly believe that a change in perspective is all that is needed to start making a difference. I am one who lives my life in a way that defies the logic of the current social construct, and while it works for me, I know that it is not applicable to everyone. When you’re thinking about how to pay the bills, how to feed your family, the state of your soul is the last thing you tend to think about, but in the ultimate purpose of life, it should in fact be the first.
So, to anyone who is struggling between the reality of their being and the illusion of their physical life, you can use a few of the guidelines below to help you make a transition towards achieving a middle ground until you arrive at your ideal situation.
- Learn about yourself. Who are you? Identify your likes and dislikes, your strengths and flaws.
- What skills come naturally to you? What are your innate talents? For me, I retain information easily, I’m good at organizing data, and my logic skills allow me to connect the dots and find a solution to help a project move forward. I’m also great at communicating and presenting information. These are things that help me as a project manager.
- What brings you joy? What are the things you do that make forget about time and space and help you feel at peace? For me, it’s writing, talking to other people, thinking (important when strategizing)
- What are your values? Integrity? collaboration? excellence?
- To these important questions, integrate other factors that are important to you such as the location of the job (whether it allows remote work or not), the minimum salary you will entertain, the mission and direction of the company, etc…
These guidelines should help you (and I) determine which job/role would be best for you and which companies you should consider. Granted, this is not a foolproof way of choosing the perfect fit, but it should weed out a lot of mismatches.
Once this is implemented, and you find yourself still feeling out of alignment, the suggestion would be to pursue the things that ignite your souls as a hobby until they can become your main activity. However, you would need to be diligent in carving out time to practice your hobby, and not let the everyday hustle get in the way of finding and connecting with yourself.
